Walks : a new journey

Barns at Parc Walk from Croesor to Gelli along the ridgeline via Garth y Foel

Barns at Parc
Walk from Croesor to Gelli along the ridgeline via Garth y Foel

I will begin again
walk this land
the mists and the mountain
I will feel again
create this world
the paint and charcoal
I will begin

a new journey

I am beginning again…stripping back my work. I will start with the walks and go back to the studio to re-create my journey, from fragments of memory, sketches, photographs, words and feelings. I want to become familiar with the journey.

The Farrow and the Balls

I like some, not all
he muttered
to the cushion to my right
It is too..
(pause for embarrassed effect)…
spiritual
he explained…for me

No spirit in here I thought
to myself
the place is all substance
no energy
just patterns
of niceness
and taste

Too hippy I offered
Yes that’s it he
concedes
and consoles

And then the paynes grey
won through
smashed hard gained defences
a palette knife offensive
nailed
to the bland
and the smooth
the insipid and the
tasteful
the farrow and the balls

Bilbao from 1997

Bilbao
from 1997

Responses

Not worthy,

of a  smiling face,

a cross kiss of approval,

or even a jagged word

crying plagiarism.

Honestly is really,

the kindliest policy.

she muses.

No like, no response,

implies all.

But then I judge

all my life,

sometimes,

on the breath,

of others.

New Beginnings: Going with the Flow

It begins….I have gone back to the rocks and the sea and the flow. I am starting to feel my way around the subject…to delve deeper and to enjoy the physical process of painting. Letting go with brush and pastel and pencil and charcoal, Stabbing, gouging, gently stroking, feeling my way around my response to the rocks, the sea and the memories they evoke. A Cornish Summer…. Hot summer sun in azure skies contrasting with the cold, wild Atlantic.. warm granite slowly eroding..seaweed clinging to the surface, billowing out in graceful, dancing fronds of deepest green, contrasting with the soft turquoise of the ocean. I’m back there again, transported by paint and the flow of time.

The new ‘rock series’ painting

Detail of Rock painting..think I could use this as a basis for a new work

Sketch book : Rocks

New Beginnings

I am currently undertaking a personal epiphany on the subject of my own art work. Since I began creating work that I have offered for sale, I have been torn between my personal validation of the work I produce and the desire to please both buyers,critics and galleries. My artistic integrity has often been found wanting in that I began to create work which was less about my interpretation of the environment I exist within and more about creating work to please, becoming more about attempting to produce the chocolate box stuff that haunts galleries throughout the breadth of Wales. I justified this action with the excuse that I was ‘exploring’ my art, but there was always something lacking in the Authenticity of my work. Perhaps there is an underlying credibilitybut it never felt true or real. There is also the issue of selling the work, which also creates pressures, particularly when you are attempting to make some sort of living out of art. As this has proved not to be the case I can now safely dismiss this as a credible reason for continuing down this path. I am I think finally tasting the sweet (yet dangerous?) taste of freedom.
Anyway the conclusion I have now reached is that I will begin creating work that I like, that touches the core of me..perhaps this may also touch the core of others but the most important point is in all of this is I don’t care about how others perceive my work any more. It is mine and if it is liked than that is good… but no more than that.

This post was originally posted on 6th April 2011 on my bevdunne.blogspot.co.uk art blog. I still think it is relevant and to be honest things have not really moved on since then. I must heed my own advice and ‘do’ the art that I want to ‘do’. So I will…it begins…………

It begins…work in progress

Ice melts::Debt Grows

Ice melting slowly.

I create slowly.

laborious mark making

tenuous touches of pencil and paint.

More trees.

Determined

to explore the trees

to create more.

But today interrupted by the incessant phone calls

Demanding their money

with interest

beyond my means

veiled threats

But I pretended to be my daughter

grown with voice

to tell them

No

Small Hawthorn painting